Power of Positive Words on the Child

Suhasini
2 min readMar 17, 2022

Parenting is a hard job and I saw recently some survey results on social media that, the parenting workload for a mother is equal to 2.5 times the work pressure it seems.

Most of us agree with that survey results, isn’t it? So as a natural outcome, whenever we meet our fellow parents in any social situation, we tend to unwind by cribbing about our children.

We really don’t think too much about that. But have you ever realized how we are making our children feel with this continuous cribbing or complaining to the other parents?

Even, I was no different, I used to complain about my child — saying “he doesn’t eat properly or he is not interested in that game or book, etc. 🤦‍♂️

When one of my friends have started complaining about her son to me, I had observed the twinkle fading away from that boy’s face (mind you, that boy is a teenager).

That’s when this fact stuck to me like a thunderbolt. It’s always about how we parents become the kid’s inner voices. If we keep complaining always, the kids tend to think only negatively about themselves and then they never get an opportunity to change.

Later in the evening, I happen to read a story from Shri Ramakrishna Paramhamsa’s life history.

In that tale, a worried mother approaches guruji for advice on bettering her son’s life. Then guruji asks what does her son does daily? Then this lady went on telling all negative things for more than 30 minutes to guruji. Then guruji asked her to tell something at least positive about her son, for which she couldn’t go on for more than 10 minutes.

Then guruji told her to repeat whatever positive words she told about her son in front of him for three months and then come back for further consultation. Surprisingly the mother came back to Shri Ramakrishna Paramhamsaji after three months in a very happy mood to share the good news that her son had actually accomplished a lot during these last three months. She gave the sweets and left after seeking his blessings.

Then when his other disciples asked him, how the change in that lady’s son came, whether the guruji has done any magic. Guruji replied that magic is the positive words spoken by his mom only. Isn’t it awesome, how the positive words have indeed changed that person?

So, now I learned my lesson and speak a little more carefully about my son to others. It's not that I don’t get frustrated or disappointed, but going forward I am showing all my frustrations or disappointments directly to my child only. I explain them in such a subtle manner that the message would get passed on and not the emotions.

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Suhasini

I am a Kids and Parents Life Coach as well as an Author and Mental Health, parenting blogger. You can reach me at my blog — https://mommyshravmusings.com